“Dime store cowboy, you look so good, with your red boots, hat, and buckle from Hollywood.” –Split Lip Rayfield
Fat Guy Fly Fishing had a series of posts titled Do You Know These People?
He forgot to add one crucial persona, the Dime Store Cowboy. Let me introduce by paraphrasing the words of this guide I know:
So the guy gets on my boat dressed head to toe in REDACTED, and he’s got his rods that cost more than my boat and he gets up there and starts telling me what do do and the fucker can’t cast 10 feet! Fish are busting right in front of him and he’s blaming me and telling me CLOSER! CLOSER! And I try to give him some tips but he already knows it.”
He’s the guy you sit next to on the plane in the neatly pressed traveler’s adventure shirt because he needs the sun collar and venting in the aisle seat. And he asks you where you’re going fishing and then tells you about all his trips and says, rather dismissively, “you haven’t fished unless you’ve fished Christmas Island.” Oh, ok.
[More Split Lip, "Don't say you're my friend, hell, if you say it again, I'm gonna come at you with my fist, cocked gun in my boot."]
Pete McDonald
booya. lay down the smack
just wallowing in my own semi-competence
barely competent?
I love the stories of those guys when they bring their Girlfriends with them. They tell the guide, “I know what I’m doing, just get her into some fish.” Then they get uptight because she catches all the fish.
I don’t know where I fall. Where is the category for self-admitted total boner.
Usually, the self-admitted total boners are the best fisherman of the bunch. And if not, they’re nonetheless headed for greatness.
@MG: you’re just trying to drum up business for your coconut cups and helmets
@rough – So untrue…I would never try to sell anything to anyone!
PS: Pete, when’s my raw materials shipment due to arrive?
I was a bonehead, until I started fishing full time wearing Gracie Coconut Headwear. It’s improved my casting distance by 30 feet and upped my catch ratio by 27 percent. Science supports this.
don’t forget that the Gracie Coconut Cup System™ makes you a big hit with the ladies
The orders are already flooding in – send your angel funding now, before it’s too late!
I already took a bath on the banjo minnow
If I do a part 3, I will be sure to get him in there.
great post on FGFF and great follow up here. thanks for giving us this existential ball of twine to bat around with. I can honestly say I have no idea which IDENTITY I fall into. “Work In Progress” probably suits best
seperately…. I deeply deeply love Fritz Scholder, I’m a lifelong fan. an unexpected and refreshing visual while perusing the fishing blogs! Pete, I am hoping you’ve had a chance to see his recent retrospective in nyc
fun stuff boys!
If FGFF comes up with “Wanton Underachiever” that’s where I fall.
On that note, I have until May 17th to see the exhibit here in NYC, so I will probably procrastinate for a few more weeks.