“Dime store cowboy, you look so good, with your red boots, hat, and buckle from Hollywood.” –Split Lip Rayfield

Fat Guy Fly Fishing had a series of posts titled Do You Know These People?

Part One

Part Two

He forgot to add one crucial persona, the Dime Store Cowboy. Let me introduce by paraphrasing the words of this guide I know:

So the guy gets on my boat dressed head to toe in REDACTED, and he’s got his rods that cost more than my boat and he gets up there and starts telling me what do do and the fucker can’t cast 10 feet! Fish are busting right in front of him and he’s blaming me and telling me CLOSER! CLOSER! And I try to give him some tips but he already knows it.”

He’s the guy you sit next to on the plane in the neatly pressed traveler’s adventure shirt because he needs the sun collar and venting in the aisle seat. And he asks you where you’re going fishing and then tells you about all his trips and says, rather dismissively, “you haven’t fished unless you’ve fished Christmas Island.”  Oh, ok.

[More Split Lip, "Don't say you're my friend, hell, if you say it again, I'm gonna come at you with my fist, cocked gun in my boot."]